The guy who asked, “Why?Are you being chased?”
If you’ve known me for less than 10 years, you probably wouldn’t guess that I used to be the guy who, when someone said they were going to run a 5K, would respond with, “Why? Is someone chasing you?”
But in 2016, and every year before that, I was that guy.
Growing up, I was the kid who dreaded schoolyard team picks, dressing out for PE, the President’s Fitness Challenge, and yes… even Field Day.
What I dreaded most, though, was “Back to School” shopping.
Don’t get me wrong. I loved buying school supplies. There was nothing like walking down the aisle at K-Mart and seeing new Trapper Keepers, stacks of three-ring paper, colored pencils and cool erasers. But buying new clothes? That was the part I hated.
Although I grew up in Raleigh, I was born in a small town in eastern North Carolina. Let’s just say there weren’t a lot of shopping options at Berkeley Mall. And there were even fewer options for young boys like me who were labeled “husky.” I still hate that word today.
All throughout childhood, I battled my weight. I don’t remember being teased terribly. Honestly, I was a pretty cool, smart, funny kid and was liked by most people. You just didn’t want me on your kickball or dodgeball team. And even though people weren’t intentionally cruel, there were the situations that left emotional scars.
I tried “solutions” for years
For years, I tried all kinds of weight-loss methods. I vividly remember being around eight or nine and going to a place in Goldsboro called the Diet Center. I had to monitor my food intake and take a bunch of supplements. The part I remember most? I couldn’t stand swallowing pills, so my dad would crush them up at breakfast so I could get them down. It was disgusting. That didn’t last long.
I even remember my grandmother, who was fairly well off, making bets with me over the years and paying me for every pound I lost.
Around age 10, my parents divorced, and before high school we moved to Raleigh. Hoping for a fresh start, I joined the wrestling team. I can’t remember how many practices I attended, but I do remember going to one away match… and never stepping on a wrestling mat again.
Soon after that, I started hanging out with some neighborhood kids who liked to have a lot of fun after school. Around age 14, I had my first cigarette (stolen from my mom’s pack). That became a habit I wouldn’t break for about 25 years. (More on that journey later.)
Fast-forward: marriage, kids, and a wake-up call
Fast-forward to 2015. I’m married with two kids, and I’m as active as someone can be who quit smoking about five years earlier. My doctor warned me that quitting smoking often leads to weight gain. But, he added, “You can always lose weight. You can’t replace a lung.” Good advice.
Then in 2016, my daughter and I were at an amusement park with a group of dads and daughters. We were having a blast, until we got to one particular ride. I don’t even remember the ride. I only remember what happened.
As we were about to board, the attendant glanced at me, leaned in, and quietly asked, “Sir… I don’t mean to ask, but how much do you weigh?”
I had climbed to over 325 pounds.
When I whispered the number, he looked down, shook his head, and said, “Sir, I’m sorry. With your weight, you and your daughter won’t be able to ride together.”
My heart dropped. I politely stepped aside, let another dad ride with my daughter, and did the walk of shame back through the line. In that moment, every old memory came rushing back—and one thought got loud and clear:
Something has to change. And that change has to start with me.
The simple rule that worked (and still does)
From that day forward, I committed to getting healthy and letting weight loss become the result of that decision. I didn’t do anything extreme. I followed a simple principle that still resonates with me today:
Move your feet more than your fork.
More calories out than in. But good calories. And none of this starvation nonsense.
I also had some great conversations with my doctor. He told me to forget the noise around BMI. If I could lose 15–25% of my body weight, I’d be amazed by the health benefits.
Over about 18 months, I lost 30% and got down to 220 pounds. I felt incredible. That’s also when I started running and working out.
Progress isn’t linear—and that’s okay
I’ve still had my roller-coasters. Over the last two years, I crept back up to around 270. It goes on easier than it comes off. But I refocused and I’m back around 240 now. I’ve also built more muscle and I feel amazing.
And you know what? Who cares.
At this point, it’s not about chasing a number. It’s about feeling healthy.
This weekend, our whole family went to Nashville. And the same guy who couldn’t ride a ride with his 10-year-old in 2016? He went bike riding with his now 19-year-old… and had to wait for her as she walked her bike up a few hills because her legs were too tired.
And did I mention I turn 55 this year? 😊
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